Vidya: Infidelity Is Unacceptable To Me

It has been 10 years since Vidya Balan set foot in Bollywood. And her journey has been a delight for both the actress herself and the audience. She opens up to SpotboyE.com about her run in the industry, Hamari Adhuri Kahani and more. Excerpts:

You completed 10 years in the industry. Let’s rewind on your career.
Parineeta worked beautifully. My next few films worked too. But there were a few films, specifically Heyy Babyy and Kismat Konnection, which worked at the box-office but they didn't work for me. It was around this time that people started saying she is trying too hard to fit in. I was trying to do things that I thought a Hindi film heroine should do.
But I'm so glad those films happened because I found my feet again. I reclaimed myself. Finally, I realised that I should do films that I feel strongly about. I don't regret any of those movies.

Those films must have left you affected
Of course. I used to be so low that I didn't want to get out of bed. I remember my mom telling me, “Why are you getting so bogged down? If they are criticising your weight, you can lose all the weight. If its about clothes, you can get a good designer. They are not saying that you're not a good actor and that is what you're here to do.” My brother-in-law too said the same thing. So my family and my faith gave me strength.

I am someone who prays a lot. I used to go to the Chembur mandir close to my house every day. There were days when I would just sit there and cry. There were days when I didn't want to go to the temple because I was angry with God.

So what changed it all?
Finally, I signed Ishqiya. When I started shooting for the film, it reinstated my faith in myself as an actor. That changed everything. If I feel this strongly as an actor, then everything else becomes secondary.

You then did bold films like Ishqiya and The Dirty Picture. Did you have any apprehensions?
No, not at all. I was just responding instinctively as an actor. If I wasn't convinced about a certain line, then I shouldn't have done the film at all. I consider all these things before I say yes to a film. When I had to abuse Naseer saab in the film, I went up to him and said, Listen, I have to abuse you and I am feeling awkward. He just held my hand and diffused the tension. So I didn't do the film to create some sort of image. I did whatever the character required me to do.

Ditto with The Dirty Picture. People would come and tell me, We've heard you're doing the film on Silk Smitha. Don't do it. You're not the kind of actress who should this film.

But I read the script, I bought intro Milans vision and it was being produced by Ekta Kapoor. So I knew that this is the film I really want to do.

How did your parents react to your signing The Dirty Picture?
When I took up the film, I told them that it might require me to do things that might make you all uncomfortable when you watch it. My biggest compliment came from my father. During the interval, he messaged me saying, I don't see you anywhere. I only see Silk. After that, it didn't matter to me what anyone else in the world said. I went to the screening after the film got over. My mom had tears in her eyes. She said, There is nothing sleazy or vulgar or anything of the sort. You were so good, we are proud of you. For me, my family approving of what I do is very important. I don't want them to feel awkward on account of my actions.

Along the way, you also learnt to say 'no' to films that didn't appeal to you. Right?
Its been one of my most important lessons. If I had to say no to a reputed director earlier, I used to fight shy and make all sorts of excuses. But I realised during that time, that it was best to be honest. Otherwise it comes back to bite you where it hurts the most.

I'm referring to Sujoy Ghosh offering you his next and Vishal Bhardwaj offering you the next part of Ishqiya.
No, Vishal didn't offer me the next part of Ishqiya.

Ekta Kapoor also offered you a film?
No.

Haven't you upset Sujoy by turning down his film?
I couldn't do it because I had health issues. His team was already there in Kolkata. It didn't make sense to push the film by a few months when work was already underway. It was unfortunate but I had no choice.

How is your equation with him now?
I haven't met him or spoken to him since. Its obviously awkward but we made a beautiful film together and he is someone I am very fond of. I know he is upset but hopefully, hell come around someday.

You got married when you were at the top of your game. Heroines tend to procrastinate marriage as they feel it hampers their career. Did you also feel the same way?
No, absolutely not. I had never imagined getting married. But I met Siddharth (Roy Kapur) and that changed. It seemed like the most natural thing for me to do. I don't think you can time these things ki haan, ek aur film ke baad ya paanch aur film ke baad. We both were ready for marriage. I didn't think it will affect my career.

After enjoying a string of hits, you had 3 successive films that didn't click at the box-office Ghanchakkar, Shaadi Ke Side Effects and Bobby Jasoos. How was that period?
It saddened me. After 7 or 8 consecutive hits, when Ghanchakkar didn't work suddenly, I was like, how can this happen? I was in denial for the longest time. I had just gotten married. At that time, I remember someone telling me that films of married actresses don't work. And I did consider it very, very fleetingly. But it passed as easily (pauses).

Go on
I was absolutely confused when the film didn't work. After the initial shock, I realised that the film failed to connect with the audience. I couldn't fault myself or anybody else for it. We all made it with the best intention. Then I was fine. When Shaadi Ke Side Effects happened, I was better at dealing with it. By Bobby Jasoos, I was quite used to it (laughs).

Hamari Adhuri Kahani was panned by the critics while the audiences reaction was mixed. How did you react to it all?
I don't read reviews. So I am quite sorted that way. I don't know what people are saying because I am not on any social media. But I always believed that the film will connect with the audience. It is not your regular film, its like Aashiqui 2. No longer do you see people crying in theatres, which happened with me when I saw Aashiqui 2. I wanted that to happen with this film. Hamari also gave me the chance to work with Bhatt saab (Mahesh Bhatt). A section of the critics may have felt that the film is not what they wanted it to be. The film is what we all wanted it to be.

Do you think it has connected with the audience?
It has. The numbers are proving that. Its running strong on weekdays too. Even on Monday, our numbers were 50% of our Sunday collections. That is a big deal because Monday collections are usually compared to a Friday. So I'm feeling validated. Plus, it has become tax-free in 3 states  MP, Chhattisgarh and UP. People are responding beautifully. The messages I am receiving are so heartfelt.

I was at the National College (Bandra) signal yesterday when a bunch of transvestites, beggars and children gathered around my car. They told me that they just saw Hamari and they started telling my dialogue, ‘Maang meri, sindoor tumhare naam ka.' I went and told Mohit (Suri) and Bhatt saab that this is the real reaction. Its so overwhelming.

The film deals with finding love outside marriage. What is your take on infidelity?
I think its unacceptable. Having said that, I don't think anyone cheats on anyone because they want to. Or so I would like to believe. I think pyaar kiya nahi jaata, ho jaata hai.

What next after this?
I will tell you very soon.

10 years have already passed since youre in the industry. How many years do you see yourself working?
I want to keep working till I am alive.

So if you're offered a role where you have to play mother to a 20 year old, will you agree?
I have played mother to a 67-year-old (Amitabh Bachchan in Paa). Are you still asking me that question? (laughs) 


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